Connect Java to a MySQL database

How do you connect to a MySQL database in Java?

When I try, I get

java.sql.SQLException: No suitable driver found for jdbc:mysql://database/table
    at java.sql.DriverManager.getConnection(DriverManager.java:689)
    at java.sql.DriverManager.getConnection(DriverManager.java:247)

Or

java.lang.ClassNotFoundException: com.mysql.jdbc.Driver

Or

java.lang.ClassNotFoundException: com.mysql.cj.jdbc.Driver